There's a buckle tower bell
          Where the can of goose grease fell.
Near the prison wall along the river edge.
The pretty Swedish dame
Sells pastry, also game,
          There in the yellow wagon. See her dredge
The plate of griddle cakes
With a dash of gravy flakes,
          It's quite enough to make yer liver jump.
Your stomach never aches
When the Swedish maiden bakes
The waffle in the wagon near the pump.
With a diddle daddle dump
And a fiddle'faddle flump,
          We contemplate the waffle near the pump.

It's time to close each eye.
In my unpretentious sty
          Invariably I fight with many fleas
Whilst dreaming of the jugs
I'm troubled with the bugs,
          They fight about my nozzle till I sneeze.
I wake, I hear a creak
That pump it makes a squeak,
          Where many blossoms cluster in a clump.
Oh what a happy clay!
From that prison far away
          I first beheld the grease upon the pump.
With a diddle daddle dump
And a fiddle faddle flump,
We contemplate the grease upon the pump.

From the parapet on high
This fascinates my eye—
          Behold the valley slipping like a slump.
Beneath the frowning rocks
I see the copper box—
The goose grease in the shadow of the pump.
 Dear me, alas, alack!
I'm itching down the back,
          I'm looking for a window, let us jump.
More oxygen I reel!
Oh if I could but steal
          The sausage in the wagon near the stump.
With a diddle daddle dump
And a fiddle faddle flump,
          The sausage in the shadow of the pump.

Please come along climb up
The parapet. We sup
          Upon the turkey fricassee on toast.
Don't think it all a myth,
Nor dare to trifle with
          The buckle tower honoured with a ghost.
Dear Reader if I don't
Cut short this yarn you won't
          Hold sacred my remembrance. Don't bump
My reputation flat.
Don't gobble like a rat
          The canister of goose grease near the pump.
With a diddle daddle dump
And a fiddle faddle Rump,
We contemplate the grease upon the pump.

THE KNOTTED BAVARIAN SPHINX

THE juggling jigger departed
          Whilst dangling over the place,
He dug like a rat heavy-hearted.
          I dealt him a bump with my mace.
          He died with a smile on his face.
Whilst up in a tree—how it winks,
The knotted Bavarian Sphinx.

The nebulous niggery nigger
          Engulfed in the pond of distress,
Drags downward each wiggling figger.
          The demons of death yell, "Yes, yes!"
          We're all in a terrible mess.
Engulfed by that nebulous lynx,
The knotted Bavarian Sphinx.

The wiggling wigger all swagger
          Falls deep in the soup with a splash,
Quite killing the nagger, the bragger,
          And now I become very rash.
          I call for the platter of hash,
Prepared by that nebulous lynx,
The knotted Bavarian Sphinx.

The skin of the juggling jigger
          Turns quite inside out with a jerk.
The nebulous niggery nigger,
          Now sharpens the quivering dirk.
He slashes his throat with a smirk. '
          Whilst up in a tree—how it winks.
The knotted Bavarian Sphinx.

The wigger and jigger they drizzle
          Like oysters without any fat.
Each nebulous nigger will sizzle
          And smell like a rat on the bat,
          With a skunk in the crown of his hat.
Prepared by that nebulous lynx,
The knotted Bavarian Sphinx.

I quickly assemble my neighbours,
          Distributing harlequin roast.
At last I'm well paid for my labours,
Each duffer now stuck on a post,
          Is poisoned with nigger on toast.
          Prepared by that nebulous lynx,
The knotted Bavarian Sphinx.

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