Magdalen Hospital, 1763.
            To describe what were my thoughts my dear Madam, on being left alone, as mentioned in my last letter, is a difficult task; suffice it to say, the distraction of my mind found some vent by tears and lamentations: I now felt a degree of distress beyond what I had yet experienced, or ever feared. How severely did I arraign myself of folly, in having conceived no suspicion of this wretched woman, and quarrelled with my heart, for having seen her action in no such very strange light, as to suppose it must arise from anything but generosity. I thought that in the same situation, I should have done like her, and therefore was grateful, but not surprised: so far was my candour in thus judging of her, from administering any comfort to me, that I wished my temper more suspicious, though rendered so by defects in my own heart, from which I was now free; indeed in this case, the most common prudence might have preserved me, but I was rendered so senseless by the terrors of my situation, that I was blind to every other danger.

            I shall not tire you, Madam, with endeavouring to describe the agitation of my mind, which was far beyond all power of description, hut shall only say, that the prison I had so much feared, now appeared to me an eligible asylum, and all the hopes I had, were that if I was found refractory to the purposes of the person who had thus bought me of myself, resentment might tempt her to throw me into the goal, from which she had so cruelly relieved me.

            After breakfast was over, the woman whom the night before I had beheld with reverence and gratitude, as my noble benefactress, came into my room, and taking hold of my hand, with a fawning affectation of kindness, told me she was sorry to find I had been so ill, she supposed it was occasioned by what I had suffered the day before, but she did not doubt but I should soon recover, as my mind would forget all past disasters, in her house, which was a temple dedicated to pleasure, and continued to speak in such intelligible terms, that no farther explanation was necessary.

            To sit and hear the profession of such abandoned sentiments, was really shocking beyond expression: criminal as I had been, my detestation to this way of life, was as great as if I had been more consistently virtuous; I informed her, that she was disappointed in her views, but offered if she would forbear all attempts to induce me to comply, that I would with pleasure submit to the lowest offices in her house, or rather what she esteemed the lowest, and perform the part of a menial servant, till she herself should acknowledge that I had amply paid my debt.

            She told me that every word I spoke, more fully proved my folly, for I must be extremely silly indeed, to think she would be contented with my saving her three or four pounds a year, when she did not despair of my gaining her as many hundreds, for the first year at least, and after that, by paint and dress, I might make a very attracting figure among her girls.

            All that prayers and entreaties could do, I tried without success, and when that failed, I endeavoured to provoke her to send me to prison, but all to no other purpose, than as she said, to show my folly, in supposing she had not taught every passion as well as every principle to be subservient to her interest.

            All I uttered had no other effect, than to make her give orders, that I should not be suffered to stir out of the house.

            While I opposed her she set me at defiance, and threatened me with immediate revenge, which she was too well able to execute, having everyone at her command, and no one to defend me. I therefore tried to delay what I could not repel, and by promising to endeavour to get the better of my reluctance, prevailed upon her to allow me time to learn to command my behaviour, which in my present disposition, might disgust those she chose I should please.

            Under this pretence, I obtained liberty to live entirely in my own chamber for a whole month, hoping still that some fortunate accident might relieve me, but all in vain; at the end of that time, she assured me she would not be fooled any longer, and made me dress myself with more than usual care, in a gown and ornaments, which she had provided for me, and told me she would absolutely bring a gentleman to see me that evening, whose generosity she so much extolled, that I had some hopes I might find him generous indeed, not in lavishing money on a bawd, but in relieving the distressed; I found I had been promised to him, which though it proved that he paid high, was but a poor dependence for my expectations.

            This wretched woman kept her word with a diabolical exactness, she introduced the gentleman pretty early in the evening; for expectation made him come sooner than her visitors usually did, and she retired. I was sorry to see how much this man was struck with my appearance, it in a great degree damped my hopes, but despair encouraged me to proceed, and I began to attack his compassion in the strongest manner I could, by uttering all the sentiments of my soul; I kneeled at his feet, used tears and prayers to soften him, and did my utmost to excite his generosity.

            At first he seemed to think all this was mere hypocrisy, with a design to raise the value of his conquest, but he soon found I was perfectly sincere, and with joy I perceived him affected: this animated me still more, and I pursued my entreaties till he granted them, and told me he would desire no more of me, than that I would inform him, how in such a disposition I could come into that house.

            I then related to him the whole affair, suppressing only, the manner in which I had lived with Mr Markland, whom I called my husband, not I think out of pride; I was too much humbled to attempt to conceal even my crimes, but I feared if he knew this circumstance, he would have less regard to my petition, and think my having offended with one man, gave every other a right to expect a ready compliance with their expectations.

            When I had ended my story, the gentleman told me I might judge of his compassion from the mortification he had inflicted on himself; for that though he was much attached to the sex in general, and had always been so, he had never seen a woman he thought half so lovely as myself, that she who had the disposing of me, was sufficiently sensible of my charms, as appeared by the price she had set upon me, which however he was much more willing to lose, than to give up his title to me, but to show me he could be generous to virtue as well as to vice, he would relinquish both, and at my desire, pretend himself better satisfied with my conduct, than he had reason to be; for I had begged he would not betray me to the woman, whom I now looked upon with as much horror as I had once done with joy and gratitude.

            That he might be the better credited, he sat with me near two hours, after he had made me this promise, I wished. he would have secured me from persons less generous than himself, by redeeming me from this horrid place, but durst not hint my desire for fear of offending him, and he stifled my hopes by observing to me, how impossible it was for me to escape out of it, for that the money she had laid down for me, would be but a small part of. my debt, she would charge much for my board, and the clothes I then had on, that would run it up to a much more considerable sum.

            After having represented all this to me, and the impossibility of my prevailing with other men as I had done with him, he endeavoured to persuade me to submit patiently to my lot, and not to grant to one less generous, what I denied to him, promising that I should share his bounty, whereas it commonly was only dispensed to the person who claimed the power of selling us.

            He bore my refusal of this proposal as generously as he had done the first, and took his leave of me in the politest manner; and if I may be allowed to form any judgment from his appearance, with real concern for me.

            As soon as the gentleman was gone from the house, the old woman, and some of the young ones, who were disengaged, came to me, and carried me down into a small room to supper, where none but ourselves were admitted, not so much to indulge me, as a reward for my good behaviour, because I was thought too valuable while new to be exposed to common eyes.

            My odious companions, were in very good humour, and I was so delighted with, and encouraged by my success, that I had never before appeared so easy, I flattered myself I should continue as fortunate as I began, and the effect this hope had upon me, gave room for a supposition that I was grown better reconciled to my way of life. I was not to continue long in doubt whether my arguments would be always equally prevalent; the next day brought fresh occasion for my rhetoric, the appearance of the man was less encouraging, he wanted the politeness of manners, and good natured countenance, which was remarkable in the other, I was not however turned from my purpose, by my fears of failing in it: on the contrary, I was animated by despair more than before by hope, and by my tears and aversion, extinguished all thoughts of pleasure, or of love from his rugged breast: but leaving me with curses, he went to the old woman, and bestowing some oaths on her, made her refund the money she had received from him.

            This threw her intoa violent rage, and not being able to vent it on him, I must necessarily fall the victim: she brought up with her into my room, three of the young women, who, angry that I should, by my conduct show a dislike of theirs, were fit to assist her in executing her wrath oh me, accordingly they fell on me with the utmost fury, and beat me in the most merciless manner, till one of them hit me such a blow on the temples, as struck me senseless to the ground.

            How long I might continue in this situation, I cannot acquaint you, Madam, but against I have the pleasure of writing my next letter shall endeavour to recollect every particular circumstance which happened after my being brought to myself; I must now beg leave to conclude this letter by assuring you, Madam, that I shall ever retain the most grateful sense of your repeated kindness to me, and am,
            Madam,
            Ever Yours
            M.S.

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