Though my youth and ignorance in the real estimation of mankind prevented my thinking seriously upon such as suitor as Lothario, I was not insensible of the great estimation in which I seemed to be held by fops and danglers. My worthy aunt had more reasons than one for dissuading me to think of Lothario. Though the advancing of my interest was the pretended motive for acting upon the present recreative plan, yet her own advantage was what she had really at heart. And as my purse bore all the weight, she very judiciously conceived that the sooner I married the sooner she would be precluded from my assistance, especially if I was to wed a man of sense and discernment sufficient to see into her real designs. She conceived if I married a beau or a fool, he might be persuaded to believe that she had all along acted the parent's part, and that it would still be for my own advantage to remain under so good and experienced a tutoress. For these reasons I never had a single thing said to me by the butterflies of the day, but she advised me to listen to so genteel a man, so polite a person, so elegant a fellow. A girl's natural vanity and fondness of dress and parade are alone sufficient incentives for her to consider those heterogeneous animals in a point of light very different from what they merit. The sanction this disposition received from my gouvernante, made me conceive I was in terrestrial Elysium every time a powdered puppy told me, with an unmeaning face, that I was the sweetest creature he had ever seen.

            Dorimont, that compendium of perfumery, who spoke only to hear his own sweet voice, smiled only to display his dimple, and laughed only to manifest the whiteness of his teeth; the unmeaning, insignificant, odoriferous Dorimont was a professed suitor of mine. He was enamoured, because it was the fashion to be in love; but this passion never exceeded the bounds of the most insipid delicacy, of the most unmeaning chastity. He would fain have had the world believe he was a happy man, but he was not desirous of taking the trouble to being so. The summit of Dorimont's bliss was to be considered a favourite of the ladies. Did they but smile upon him at the play, or ogle him at Ranelagh–oh! The happy, too happy Dorimont! A new toast no sooner made her appearance than he contrived some method of being introduced to her; and he was sure to be the first man that was seen with her tête-à-tête in public. All his faculties were confined to studying the means of procuring these desirable ends; and it must be acknowledged to his credit that his success was equal to his industry.

            Dorimont was a great favourite of my aunt's. She had prevailed upon him to believe she was a very sensible woman, had seen much of the world, kept the best company and had always been esteemed for her politeness and agreeable conversation. This favourable opinion which Dorimont entertained of my aunt made her, by a certain reciprocity of sentiment, entertain very favourable notions of Dorimont, who in her eyes was the accomplished gentleman, a perfect master of good breeding, has an excellent test for address, and most engaging manner and, above all, was a complete judge of mankind. What could be more endearing than all these accomplishments in a husband? But the misfortune was, he never opened his lips upon the score of matrimony, or indeed a tender passion, except is where to tell me that he should be the most miserable wretch alive if I refused him the happiness of my hand–to Ranelagh.

            My aunt would fain have had him more explicit upon these heads, and often urged him to come to an éclaircissement.<156> But how can a man explain his meaning, when he has none? All his passions centred in dress, parade, and vanity. He was an utter stranger to all impure ideas of carnality. He was in love, it was true; but then it was not with my person–but my negligee. He was always captivated with a woman in proportion to her dress–and I lost my lover, because Miss D–– appeared at night in Ranelagh in the last new fashioned silk, which I was not mistress of.

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