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Maria Brown by John Cleland (1766)

The Covent Garden Calendar - Chapter III.

Chapter III.


Maria's arrival at Liverpool–Embarks for Calais–Her meditations–Her acquaintance with Miss Fleetwood–This young lady's story.

            My slumbers were not in the least interrupted till we arrived at Liverpool, and we stopped at the inn, where I was to take a farewell supper with my father. The ship was ready to sail the next morning and, after a very affectionate scene that passed between Mr Brown and myself, I went on board.

            A fresh gale sprung up, and in about three hours we were almost out of sight of land, but to the last my fond eyes stole a look at Albion's cliffs. 'Farewell to my native shore, relations, friends, all that's dear, perhaps for ever!' A flood of tears burst upon the conclusion of this soliloquy, which closed the scene of all but the watery element. And now succeeded such a qualm of stomach as entirely diverted my thoughts from everything but present relief, which I, in some measure, obtained, by the customary operation of seasickness; and a few hours after I had such an eager appetite, that having found in the cabin some ship-beef, I made the most hearty and most delicious regale I ever had in my life.

            My spirits being by these means somewhat recruited, I began to consider my situation in a more favourable point of light than I had hitherto looked upon it, and my affliction was greatly alleviated by finding a young lady on board who was destined for the like station and the same convent as myself–so true is it that a companion in affliction diminishes our sorrows. We soon entered into familiar chat, when she acquainted me with her family and connections, and the cause of her being sent abroad.

            'My dear,' said she, 'you most likely have heard of my family and friends. My name is Juliana Fleetwood. My father lives within a few miles of Lancaster; he has a patrimonial estate of about two thousand a year, and I am his only daughter. My mother died about four years ago, and I have been under the care of a distant female relation ever since. This cousin of mine was not without her foibles, and perhaps the most predominant one she had was that of drinking. As I had it in my power to promote her indulging herself in this respect, so she, in return, gave me all the liberty of conscience and action I could desire. I was without any sort of constraint when I attended that age that determined I was a woman. I had read a lot of the stories and little romances, which our maids furnished me with. In reading Pamela, I was greatly pleased to find that she was at last made happy; and this event so strongly operated upon my mind, that from this moment I looked upon all distinction of birth and fortune as no sort of impediment to two persons being united, whose affections were mutual.

            'With these romances in my head, and favourable dispositions in my heart, our house was more like a nunnery than a gentleman's country-seat. And I had never yet set my eyes upon anything that is called a gentleman in our neighbourhood except a country squire, who was a great sportsman and who more resembled his dogs and horses than a rational creature. He could talk of nothing but leaping five-barred gates, being in at the death, laying the odds, and winning of plates. This was conversation I had no sort of relish for, and could not help concluding that if gentleman talked in the same strain, and on the same subject, they had little reason to pique themselves upon their birth and education. As the same time that I was drawing these no very favourable conclusions upon the score of gentility, I could not help making a comparison between the squire and William, a young footman that had been in our family for some years. Methought that his manners were more polished and his conversation, which I frequently overheard with the maids, more rational than the squire's, and with respect of his person all comparison was destroyed. The squire was clumsy, ungenteel, purblind and pock-frecken; whereas William's face was handsome, his person tall and well-made and his deportment agreeable. Upon the whole, methought nature never intended such wide distinctions as my father was continually making between people of fashion and the laborious part of mankind.

            'I had for some time observed that William's peculiar study was to endeavour at anticipating all my orders. He guessed by my emotions what I seemed desirous of, and scarce ever gave me an opportunity to ask for a thing. Such attention on his part, I must acknowledge, attracted my observation more than usual, and I could not help frequently casting a glance to see with what readiness he caught my looks; and yet our eyes scarce ever met but what I could perceive a sort of confusion in his countenance.

            'He was one afternoon waiting upon me whilst I was drinking tea, all alone, in our summer-house at the end of the garden; when, giving him a nod to fill the pot, he did it, uttering such a sigh, that I could not help jocosely asking him, 'Sure, Will, you're not in love?' I had not completely uttered the words, till his hand shook to that degree that he poured some water on my hand, which scalded me. He was so greatly affected with what he had done that he burst into tears, which moved me so much that, for the present, I forgot the acute pain that I felt from the boiling water, and I found myself highly interested in consoling him, by assuring him that the burn was not great and that he need not give way so much to his grief upon the occasion.

            'Upon my affording him some consolation, he dried up his tears, but gave me such a look as it is impossible for me to describe. Young and ignorant as I was in the language of the eyes, methought I read everything that the most tender, the most sensible sentiments could express.

            'From this moment I was never easy but when Will was waiting or attending upon me, and I never had so much pleasure as when I could contemplate his person, without being observed by anyone. I discovered charms in him that I had before slightly passed over. His face appeared to me that of a perfect Adonis; Cupids lay in ambush in every ringlet of his flowing chestnut hair; his whole person seems to be a model for statuaries and painters! I longed for an opportunity of saying to him something upon the score of love, and would freely have undergone the pain of having my fingers scalded again, to have had so favourable an occasion of entering upon the subject.

            'I contrived to drink tea alone in the same place a few days after. But I was no longer able to command those looks, the meaning of which he used so quickly to catch; and when I would have given him a command, I could utter nothing but a sigh. In fine, there was not a word passed upon this occasion but complete confusion on both sides, without either of us having dared to venture a look at each other.

            'The next morning I found upon my dressing-table a letter, which I opened with rapture. I believe I have it in my pocket, and will read it to you.

            Oh! Thou divine creature,
            What can be the reason I am so miserable and you so perplexed? Surely there can be no sympathy in souls which Fortune has placed at so great a distance. I dare not venture to think that you could throw away a thought upon such a wretch as me! No, it is impossible. I must fly to some remote corner of the earth, and there forget there is such a divine being as the incomparable Juliana. Why, then, do I pretend to trouble with my impertinence and folly so much excellence, where it would be the highest presumption in me to say I was her most abject slave.
            William Franklin.

            'It is impossible to express what satisfaction I received in perusing these lines. I read them over and over, and every time I thought I discovered fresh beauties and more meaning. I was, however, greatly perplexed to know what step I should take. For a young lady to write to a man appeared to me highly criminal, and especially an answer to such a letter as this. Yet I found my heart strongly pleaded for the use of pen and paper, and I should have readily submitted to its dictates, had I known what to say.

            'I was in this perplexity when he was ordered to call me to breakfast. He fell upon his knees and begged I would forgive him the imprudence he had been guilty of. Saying this, however, he insensibly got hold of my hand, and bathed it with his tears; nor could I find the least inclination to withdraw it from him.

            'All explanations now became superfluous, and we availed ourselves of every opportunity of being together, when we gave each other the strongest assurances of our mutual passion.

            'We had never yet been discovered, for my gouvernante was generally half the day so well employed with her cordial friends that she never gave us any interruption. And as to the maids, I contrived always to find them such employment at some opposite parts of the house, that our tęte-ŕ-tęte parties had never yet been broke in upon. In one of these uninterrupted conversations we took the resolution of setting off post for London, in order to be married at Mayfair Chapel.

            'My father was at this time at Bath, and everything promised fair for the execution of our project. I had packed up what clothes I thought necessary for our journey, and William had provided a post-chaise at Manchester, whiether he took me behind him upon one of my father's horses.

            'But though we succeeded thus far, our evil genius soon interfered. We met the squire upon the road. His jealousy was roused on perceiving us, as he had professed himself one of my admirers. He sent an express to my father, and when we got out of the chaise at Hyde Park Corner, we found ourselves surrounded with constables. To shorten this disagreeable part of my narrative, I was wrested from the only man I ever loved, brought back to my father's, when the alternative proposal was made me of either giving my hand to the squire, or sequestering myself from the world in a nunnery. You see the resolution I have made, and I doubt not have merited thereby your approbation.'

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