THE butcher hid the rat
Underneath his old felt hat
            The butcher made a terrible mistake
The hat was so obscure
The butcher felt quite sure
            Grandiloquent like any other rake.

Grandiloquent like any other rake
The jumping butcher did the shimmy shake
            But mother's eyes were sharper
            Than any Irish harper
She pounced upon the rat, that foxy snake.

The butcher hid the rat
Underneath his old felt hat
            The butcher's hat deep in the ice box lay.
My mother stole the rat
From underneath the hat
            And with the butcher's rat she ran away.

The day my mother stole the butcher's rat
I felt a strange sensation through each slat
            And then an awful shiver
            Went shooting through my liver,
The day my mother stole the butcher's rat.

The butcher full of spleen
Grabbed my mother by the bean
            My mother screaming, tumbled in the moat.
The butcher yanked her out
By the sharp end of her snout
            And then the butcher cut my mother's throat.

The jumping butcher cut my mother's throat
He licked his lips, he was a clever bloat.
            I drank a glass of licker
            It really made me snicker
The day the butcher cut my mother's throat.

Oh, how I grit my teeth
I took to Hampstead heath,
            Joining that famous highwayman Jack Sprat,
And now I am a thief
Fallen upon a reef
            It's all the fault of mother and her rat.

The day my mother stole the butcher's rat
I felt a strange sensation through each slat
            And then an awful shiver
            Went shooting through my liver
The day my mother stole the butcher's rat.

                                    By RICHARD GRIFFIN.

Prev Next